Horse Sense for Peacemakers

Author: Marjorie Smith (original website:  http://www.people-for-peace.com/)

On my other website (http://www.barefoothorse.com) I show how the hoof works, as an organ of the body, so that horse owners can make thoughtful decisions about the care of their horses' hooves.

On this one I'm explaining how peace works, as a quality of society, so that citizens can make thoughtful decisions about their world.

Horse owners are not generally given information about how hooves work. We leave that part of our horse's care to professionals -- many of whom don't know any more than we do about hoof anatomy, but are mainly taught how to work iron and how to shape a hoof so that an iron shoe will stay on it. Good information about hooves is just not "out there." Most domestic horses end up being killed, due to "incurable lameness," long before their expected lifetime of 30 to 40 years, and at least half of all horses are borderline lame.

When we learn how a hoof actually works, we may come to entirely different conclusions about how to care for it, than applying a piece of iron that stays on around the clock -- and deforms the foot as the toenail grows.

Citizens are not generally given information about how peace works. We leave that part of our life to "the government." Our governments don't know any more than we do, how peace works, but mainly are taught about power-politics and war strategies. Good information about peace is just not "out there."

When we learn how a peaceful society actually works, we may come to entirely different conclusions about what we want, than exploiting our fellow humans and killing them when they object.

So let's start by asking the right questions!!

"How do you take care of a horse so that its hooves remain sound for 30 to 40 years of working life?" (See my Barefoot Horse website.)

"How do you arrange a society or a world so that the people who live there find war boring and counterproductive, compared to the enjoyment and connection going on around them?"


"No hoof, no horse"

Everyone who enters the "horse world" hears the saying, "No hoof, no horse." That's shorthand for, "A limping horse cannot do his athletic job." The hoof deals with huge mechanical loads and is the body part that most often breaks down with improper care and over-use.

Sooner or later, a rider runs into the frustration of putting a lot of time and effort into a horse's training for a certain use or sport -- from backyard riding to Olympic competition -- only to have him go lame and be unrideable for weeks or months, during which time his training gets rusty and his body loses condition.

I propose a saying about peace, "No respect, no peace."

Here's my "working definition" of RESPECT: "You have a right to exist, to be who you are, and to see things your own way; therefore I will neither harm you, ignore you, nor belittle your ideas."

Peace is when every human being's physical, mental, and human-connection requirements are fully taken into account.


Horse training guidelines that peacemakers can use


Shifting gears a little, from respecting hooves to respecting the whole horse:

Most of learning how to get along with horses so we don't land in the hospital with broken bones, has to do with respecting

The horse is a BIG, STRONG animal -- the ones we ride weigh 900 to 1500 lbs. (400 to 700 kg.) It is EASILY SCARED -- like a giant rabbit, it leaps away from dangers that humans don't even notice. A scared horse may crash right through the person standing beside it. So we have to learn what kinds of things upset horses, and avoid doing horse-upsetting things. We have to make ourself into a calm, dependable person that a horse can trust, as his "herd leader," to keep him safe.

I hope you are already "getting it" that when we deal with horses in this way, we are respecting them. We are taking account of what they are -- a big, strong animal that gets scared easily. We are taking account of their point of view -- there might be a lion behind every door in the barn (and horses are lions' breakfast). We are not ignoring them -- in fact we are changing our own way of acting when we are around them, so that human and horse will both be safe.

All of the following training guidelines have to do with respect for the horse. These same ideas can help us peace-workers to build a respectful society around us.

    1) Good horse training is "boring" to watch. There is no "rodeo," no bucking and rearing. Good trainers know precious training time is lost, if they scare and provoke the horse to the point of a "rodeo" reaction. However, between the horse and the trainer, there is a lot going on and it's definitely interesting to both of them.

    Peace is "boring" to watch, there is no shooting and bombing and screaming going on. But it's definitely interesting to be part of because there is lots of fun and play, and close friendships, and doing interesting projects together.

    2) Safety first. Don't do things with a horse that can lead to accidents. (Don't ask him to gallop until you have steering at the walk -- you don't want to end up galloping out-of-control towards a highway.) Top priority is teaching the horse how to stay relaxed and calm in what is, to him, "scary" human surroundings. (We have to show him that the water-hose is not a snake about to bite him. A horse scared of the water-hose can actually squash you against the wall.)

    When dealing with a person or a group that is different from you, first you need to find out what they are scared of. Once you know that, you will "not-do" the kinds of things they find scary, so that nobody gets hurt.

    3) Build a working language between you. The human needs to learn how horses communicate with each other in the herd -- mostly with "body language." We can learn how to use our 2-legged body to "say things" in a way that the 4-legged horse can understand. The horse will also be learning our language -- "When my rider turns her head and upper body to one side, that feeling on my back means I should turn where she is looking."

    When we start to deal with a group of "different" people, we need to learn their language -- even if they are also learning ours. Some of the things that are important to them will only be say-able in their language -- and those are things we especially need to know, to understand and respect their point of view.

    4) When something isn't working, the human can always change her point of view. Most often this means putting aside a human reason (ambition, hurry, winning, etc.) that doesn't have much meaning for horses. When we act like that it makes them worried, and then accidents happen. Instead, consider what's important to the horse. It may be as simple as the saddle doesn't fit well and gouges his back when he tries to do what you ask.

    When things are not going well, we can always change our point of view. Likely what's important to us is different from what's important to another group or country. We can find out what's important to them, and what we're doing that's making them worried or irritated, and try something else.

    5) Do some ground-work before you ride. It's plain dangerous to get on a horse's back without first checking, while on solid ground, that you (not your riding teacher) and this particular horse (not the horse you rode last week) understand each other's signals and body language for "Go, stop, turn left, turn right" etc., and how this horse says "I don't understand you, please clarify."

    When dealing with a group that you're not familiar with, it's important to do some background study about them, and get to know some of them personally. Every group cares about different things than you do, every language can say things you can't say in yours (which means they can think things you can't think). Before going on to major dealing, check out the "territory." The group you dealt with last month is different from this group -- what they care about is different.

    For example, Eskimos have names for several dozen kinds of snow. Each name will tell them something about the temperature, wind direction, how long the storm should last -- knowledge that can make the difference between life and death. There is a whole world of meaning in their words for snow, that people who live outside the Arctic have no way to think about. And that world of knowledge may say a lot about whether your ideas can work at all, where they live.

    6) Chunk it down. Horses, like people, get overwhelmed and worried when we expect them to figure out a big new piece of information. Break the new idea down into smaller parts and make sure the horse understands all the parts separately before combining them into a whole.

    For example, to prepare for a new idea like "going through a gate" you could chunk it down so the horse first understands your signals for "go forward", "go sideways," "back up," and "wait while I shut the latch." You can avoid a lot of gate-horse-spaghetti by preparing the horse to understand the parts beforehand.

    Coming on strong with a big, complicated program in fancy legal terms does overwhelm and scare most groups and countries, so it's a disrespectful way to act. We can chunk it down from the beginning, as well as asking them to offer their own program, chunked-down in ways that they are already familiar with.

    7) Learn horse-politeness. Horses are very polite among themselves. They have "do's and don'ts" about getting along, just like people do. A horse will surprise you with its willingness to do something, if you ask in a horse-polite way.

    Every group and country has their own ways of being polite with each other. Learning their day-to-day politenesses can make all the difference in how well the communication and dealing goes.

    8) Ask, don't make. When you force a horse, his resentment ruins your ride and his training. The great attraction of horses is how amazing it feels when they do things with you because they want to. This is a "gift freely given" and the generosity of it can turn your life upside down.

    "Ask, don't make" is the very core of respect. Making someone do something goes against the fact they have their own point of view. People can work with you just as well as horses can. What happens when they do something because they want to will "knock your socks off."

    9) Be clear in your intentions. Horses, as a prey animal, are experts in "reading" a predator because their life depends on it. (Humans are predators, we eat animals.) For example, a herd of zebras will graze peacefully beside some lions that have just eaten and are basking in the sun -- but they leap away when they see a lion stalking. A horse can sense when you're "out to win no matter what," and it makes him uneasy, and an uneasy horse is unsafe to be around.

    People are pretty good at reading intentions, too, and they pull back and get wary when things don't add up. This is what "transparency" is all about. To bring out the best in someone -- the working-together and the great ideas -- your inner motivations have to line up with what you're saying and doing. Be truthful.

    10) Learn what motivates horses. Good trainers (including the back-yard ones) have success because they adjust their mindset and their program to take account of what horses care about.

    Every human culture is a little -- or a lot -- different. This is because each place where people live has different resources. Something that's scarce here is abundant over there. A group values what's scarce and adjusts their way of living to the scarce thing. In dealing with another group or country, it's good to find out what's scarce, what's abundant, and how that shapes their culture.

    11) Do what's healthy for the horse. Show the horse how to carry your weight in a way that won't break him down over the years. Don't overwork his body, don't overstress his mind. It's no fun to put in lots of time and effort, only to lose him to lame feet, ruined joints, or going mentally "sour" by the time he's gotten good at his job.

    This is another way of saying, "Exploitation doesn't actually pay." When we treat people badly, not only does it ruin their health and drain the energy and willingness of their society. It is also a drain on us to pay for soldiers, police, and prisons to keep people from rebelling. There comes a point when the soldiers, police, and prisons cost more, overall, than what we may "make" in profits.

    12) Appreciate the horse. Good trainers constantly point out the small improvements the horse makes as he learns, with a sound or a word, and follow-up each one with a reward. They say a bigger "Thank you!" at the end of a ride or lesson, with a food treat and lots of praise. Horses understand appreciation and will work harder and more joyfully for someone who gives lots of "thank-you's."

    Giving thank-you's and appreciations that have meaning in the other person's culture show that we respect them and their point of view.


What about the "hard cases?"

I just know somebody is going to ask me, right about now, "What do I do with so-and-so who won't deal with me?" or "What about this group or country that's out to get us?"

The first thing is I'm going to ask, "Have you been trying to swallow up their point of view with your own?" In other words, have you been respectful of them, or not? Respect and harm are opposites. If you are disrespecting somebody, that is not peace -- it prevents peace.

There's a "power point" here: When there is ongoing disrespect and harm between two people or two groups, EITHER ONE OF THEM can take charge of the situation and get things going better, by being the FIRST to take the other person's point of view into account.

So really -- take pencil and paper, and go through this list of "Horse Training Guidelines for Peacemakers." Write down the things you have done, on each point, that are respectful of the person or group you feel un-peaceful about.

Next, write down something for each point, that you haven't done yet and could do.

I'm going to guess you haven't much looked into what's important to the other person or group. Go ahead. The library and the internet are waiting for you. . .

When you've done enough backgrounding that you can put in your own words some of the things that are important to people in their culture, "walk up to the horse and do some groundwork." Get to know some people from that group or country as a friend, on solid ground, before you try to "ride" (discuss sticky issues with them). Every person that's alive has at least these things in common with you: they'd like to keep on being alive, they like to have close friends, and they like to use their mind on interesting projects that they care about.

That should get you started

Konjski čut za mirovnike





Na moji drugi internetni strani (www.barefoothorse.com) je prikazano, kako kopito, kot telesni organ, deluje, z namenom, da bi se lahko lastniki konj pametno odločili glede tega, kako naj skrbijo za njihova kopita.

Na tej internetni strani pa razlagam, kako deluje mir, kot družbena vrednota, da bi se lahko prebivalci premišljeno sprejemali odločitve o svojem svetu.

Najverjetneje niso vsi lastniki konj seznanjeni z delovanjem konjskega kopita. Ta del prepuščamo profesionalcem -- večina teh pa o tem ne ve nič več kot mi. Ne vedo, kako je kopito sestavljeno, v večini pa so naučeni, kako se oblikuje podkev in kopito, da se lepo prilegata drug drugemu. Torej nimamo dobrih podatkov o kopitih. Večina domačih konjev konča v klavnicah zaradi »neozdravljive šepavosti« še preden dočaka pričakovano življenjsko dobo 30 ali 40 let, in najmanj polovica konjev je na meji šepavosti.

Ko izvemo, kako kopito deluje lahko pridemo do čisto drugačnih zaključkov, kako zanj skrbeti. Torej bomo rešitev iskali drugje, kot v kovanju, ki deformira konjsko kopito in konjeve noge.

Državljani običajno niso seznanjeni, kako naj živijo, da bodo živeli v miru. Ta del življenja prepuščajo vladi. In vlada s tem ni nič bolj seznanjena kot mi. Ve pa, kako deluje politika in vojni sistemi. Torej o miru nimamo dobrih podatkov.

Ko pa se naučimo, kako deluje družba v kateri vlada mir, pridemo do čisto drugačnih spoznanj, in ne do izkoriščanja in celo pobijanja soljudi, ko se uprejo.

Začnimo z zastavljanjem pravih vprašanj!!

»Kako naj skrbim za konja, da bodo njegova kopita ostala zdrava 30 do 40 let?« (Glej mojo internetno stran Barefoot Horse)

»Kako naj se družba organizira, da bodo ljudje poznali, da je vojna dolgočasna in uničujoča v primerjavi z veseljem, ki ga občutijo ljudje, ki so povezani?«

"»Brez kopita ni konja.«


Kdor vstopi v svet konjev sliši ta rek. To je okrajšava za »Šepav konj ne more biti atlet.« Kopito se sooča z velikimi mehanskimi pritiski, je pa tudi tisti del telesa, ki ob nepravilni oskrbi in preveliki obrabi najpogosteje odpove.

Prej ali slej, se vsak jahač sooči s frustracijami zaradi veliko časa in napora, ki jih mora vlagati v treniranje konja za določen  namen ali šport -- od rekreativnega jahanja pa vse od olimpijskega nivoja -- samo zato, da postane šepav in ga tedne ali mesece ne moremo jahati, konj pa med tem pade iz forme in njegovo telo izgubi vzdržljivost.

Glede miru pa predlagam ta rek: »Brez spoštovanja ni miru.«

Moja definicija SPOŠTOVANJA je: »Imaš pravico do obstoja, da si kdor si in da gledaš na stvari iz tvojega zornega kota; zato te ne bom poškodoval/a, ne prezrla in ne podcenjevala tvojih zamisli.«

Mir je, ko so fizične, mentalne in družbene potrebe vsakega živega bitja v celoti upoštevane.

Principi treniranja konj, ki jih lahko uporabljajo tudi mirovniki


Od spoštovanja do kopit k spoštovanju celega konja:

Pri učenju, kako naj s konji ravnamo, da se ne bi znašli v bolnišnici zaradi poškodb, ima največjo vlogo spoštovanje. Konja spoštujemo kot »od nas različno, a razmišljujoče in umljivo bitje«.

Konj je VELIKA in MOĈNA žival -- konji, katere jahamo tehtajo od 400 do 700 kg. So LAHKO PRESTRAŠLJIVI -- podobni so ogromnim zajcem, odskočijo ob nevarnostih, ki jih ljudje niti ne zaznamo. Konj, ki se prestraši lahko skoči naravnost v osebo, ki stoji poleg njega. Torej se moramo naučiti, kaj konja prestraši, in se tem stvarem izogniti. Preobraziti se moramo v mirne in zaupljive osebe, da nam bo konj zaupal kot zaupa »voditelju črede«, da ga bo varoval.

Upam, da se vam je že posvetilo, da s takim ravnanjem kažemo spoštovanje do konja. Zavedamo se jih -- da so veliki, močni in da se lahko prestrašijo. Zavedamo se njihovega pogleda na svet -- obstaja možnost, da se za vsakimi hlevskimi vrati skriva lev (in levi jedo konje za zajtrk). Ne preziramo jih -- da bi bili varni, tako konji kot mi v njihovi družbi, se odzivamo na drugačen način.

Vsem nadaljnim smernicam, ki jih uporabljamo za učenje konj, je skupno spoštovanje do konja. Te iste ideje, lahko nam, graditeljem miru, pomagajo, da okoli nas zgradimo družbo spoštovanja.

1. Dober trening je za gledalce »dolgočasen«. To ni noben rodeo, ni brcanja in ne vzpenjanja. Dobri trenerji vedo, da je dragoceni čas za trening izgubljen, če konja prestrašijo in razdražijo. Ampak, med trenerjem in konjem se veliko dogaja, in je zanju brez dvoma zelo zanimivo.

Mir je »dolgočasen«. Ni ne streljanja, ne bombardiranja in niti kričanja.  Zagotovo pa je zanimivo sodelovati. Veliko je smeha in igre, dobrih prijateljstev in sodelovanja v zanimivih projektih.

2. Najprej je varnost. Ne počenjajte s konji stvari, ki lahko pripeljejo do nesreč. (Ne galopirajte, če konja težko nadzorujete v hodu -- nočete sedeti na konju, ki brez nadzora drvi proti avtocesti.) Prednost dajemo torej učenju, kako naj konj ostane miren in sproščen v njemu »strašljivem« človeškem okolju. (Moramo mu pokazati, da cev za vodo ni kača, ki ga bo prej ali slej pičila. Konj, ki se boji cevi, nas lahko stisne ob zid.)

Ko imamo opravka  s človekom, ali skupino, ki je različna od nas, moramo najprej zvedeti, česa se bojijo. Ko to izvemo, teh stvari ne bomo počeli, tako se nihče ne bo »poškodoval«.

3. Vzpostavimo način sporazumevanja. Ljudje se moramo naučiti, kako se konji sporazumevajo v čredi -- večinoma s »telesno govorico«. Tudi mi, ki imamo samo 2 nogi, se lahko naučimo »povedati stvari«, ki jih je sposoben štirinožni konj razumeti. Istočasno pa se konj uči naše govorice. »Ko moj jahač  obrne glavo in zgornji del telesa na eno stran ta občutek na mojm hrbtu pomeni, da moram zaviti  v tisto stran, v katero on gleda.«

Ko se ukvarjamo s skupino od nas »različnih ljudi«, se moramo naučiti njihovega jezika -- pa čeprav se tudi oni učijo našega. Nekatere njim pomembne stvari bodo izgovorljive le v njihovem jeziku -- in prav te stvari moramo vedeti, da bi razumeli in spoštovali njihovo mnenje.

4. Ko gredo stvari narobe, lahko človek vedno spremeni svoje stališče. Najpogosteje to pomeni, da se odrečemo človeškim vzrokom (ambicijam, naglici, zmagovanju, itd.), ki konjem ne pomenijo veliko. Ko ravnamo na takšen način, postane to za konja zaskrbljujoče, in v takih primerih se dogajajo nesreče. Namesto tega raje upoštevajmo stvari, ki so za konja pomembne. Lahko da gre le za slabo pristoječe mu sedlo, ki ga zbada v hrbet, ko želi ugoditi našim prošnjam.

Ko stvari ne gredo po načrtih lahko še vedno spremenimo svoje stališče. Možno je, da so naše vrednote različne od vrednot, ki jih ima skupina ljudi ali celo druga država. Ugotovimo, kaj je za njih pomembno, in kaj je tisto, kar jim v naših dejanjih zbuja strah. Nato poskusimo kaj drugega.

5. Preden konja zajahaš, poskusi delati z njim iz tal. Nevarno je, da se povzpnemo na konja, ne da bi mi sami (in ne naš jahalni učitelj) najprej s tal poskusili, ali ta konj (in ne tisti, ki smo ga jahali včeraj) razume naše ukaze za naprej, stop, nazaj, levo in desno. Enako pomembno pa je, da znamo razbrati obnašanje tega konja za »Tega ne raumem, prosim pojasni.«

Ko delamo s skupino, ki jo slabo poznamo, je dobro, če se o njej pozanimamo. Vsaka skupina ima drugačne vrednote od tvojih, vsak jezik ima svoje posebnosti (kar pomeni, da lahko mislijo stvari, ki jih ti ne moreš). Preden preideš k pomembnešim pogajanjem je pomembno, da področje najprej dobro preučiš. Ta skupina je različna od one, s katero si se ukvarjal prejšnji mesec, prav tako pa so različne njujine vrednote.

Na primer, Eskimi imajo imena za več ducatov vrst snega. Vsako ime vsebuje podatke o temperaturi, smeri vetra in koliko časa naj bi vihar trajal -- to znanje lahko pomeni razliko med življenjem in smrtjo. V teh imenih je združeno veliko podatkov. Ljudje, ki živijo izven Arktičnega kroga pa o teh pomenih ne moramo razmišljati. In način razmišljanja je ključnega pomena, ko se sprašujemo, če bodo naše ideje delovale, tam kjer določena skupina živi.

6. Razkosaj na manjše delce. Tako konji kot ljudje postanejo zaskrbljeni, ko ne razumejo nečesa novega, velikega, ki jim ga naložijo vodeči. Ĉe informacijo razsekamo na manjše delce bomo razumljivejši. Preden pa le-te znova sestavimo v celoto se prepričajmo, da konj razume vsakega izmed njih.

Na primer, ko želimo konja naučiti kako se gre skozi vrata pašnika mu to lahko predstavimo s posameznimi ukazi za »naprej«, »v stran«, »nazaj« in »počakaj, da vrata zaprem«. Ĉe konja ne želimo zmesti, ga najprej naučimo vsak ukaz posebej.

Predstavitev novega in pomembnega projekta z zapletenimi pravniškimi izrazi lahko skupino ali državo prestraši. če delujemo na tak način do njih ne kažemo spoštovanja. Lahko pa projekt predstavimo po točkah. Skupini ponudimo, da sama predstavi svoj projekt, ki je razčlenjen na njim že znan način.

7. Naučimo se konjske prijaznosti. Konji so med seboj zelo prijazni. Kot ljudje imajo tudi oni točno določeno, »kaj smejo in kaj ne«. Konj vas bo presentil z voljo, da izpolni vaš ukaz, če ga le vprašate na za konje prijazen način.

Vsaka skupina in država ima svoje načine vljudnosti. Ĉe se teh naučimo, bomo uspešnejši tako pri vzpostavljanju stikov, kot pri pogajanjih z njimi.

8. Vprašaj, ne stori. Ko konja silimo v nekaj, bo njegovo nezadovoljstvo pokvarilo ježo in trening. Najlepši občutek je, ko konj želi sodelovati. To je darilo in takšna velikodušnost vam lahko obrne življenje na glavo.

»Vprašaj, ne stori« je bistvo spoštovanja. Pripraviti nekoga, da nekaj naredi, gre navzkriž z dejstvom, da ima tudi on lastno voljo. Z ljudmi lahko sodelujemo prav tako kot s konji. Šokiralo vas bo, ko boste videli kakšni so rezultati, ko nekdo nekaj želi narediti.

9. Bodite jasni v svojih namerah. Konjem je prirojena sposobnost, da zanjo dobro »prebrati« morebitnega plenilca, to jim omogoča preživetje. (Ljudje smo plenilci, saj jemo živali.) Ĉreda zeber se bo mirno pasla zraven levov, ki so pravkar zajtrkovali in poležavajo na soncu -- ko pa čreda začuti, da jo lev zalezuje, bo zbežala. Konj zazna kaj naklepate. Ĉe ga pri vaših dejanjih ne jemljete v zakup, se bo počutil ogroženega in taki konji so lahko nevarni.

Tudi ljudje znamo dobro razbrati namere soljudi. Kadar stvari niso jasne, postanemo pozorni in se začnemo upirati. To je bistvo prikrivanja namer. Da bi iz nekoga potegnili najboljše zamisli in z njim sodelovali mora naša notranja motivacija sovpadati s tem kar počnemo in govorimo. Bodite verodostojni.

10. Naučite se, kaj konje motivira.  Dobrim trenerjem (tudi tisti, ki to počnrjo na domačih dvoriščih) uspeva, kajti svoj način mišljenja so prilagodli konjevemu in upoštevajo stvari, ki konjem pomembne.

Vsaka kultura ima svoje posebnosti, ki jo razlikujejo od drugih. To pa zato, ker ima vsak kraj svoje vrednote, svoja bogastva. Ĉesar je tu malo je morda drugod v izobilju. Skupina ceni redke stvari in jim prilagodi način življenja. Ko imamo opravka s tujci je dobro poznati, česa imajo v izobilju, kaj je redko in kakšen upliv ima to na njihovo kulturo.

11. Počnite kar je za konja zdravo. Naučite konja, kako naj vas nosi, da se z leti ne bo iztrošil. Ne preobremenjujte ga tako telesno kot tudi menalno. Ni zabavno, da vlagaš vanj veliko truda, le zato, da postane konj šepav, z uničenimi sklepi in psihično nestabilen ko končno postane »dober« pri nečem.

To je le drugi način za »izkoriščanje se ne izplača«. Ko z ljudmi ravnamo slabo, jim ne uničimo le njihovega zdravja in posrkamo energijo in voljo iz njihove družbe. Oškodujemo tudi sami sebe. Drago moramo plačati vojake, policijo in vzdrževati zapore, da bi ljudi odvrnili od upiranja. Tako ravnaje v končni fazi presega morebitni dobiček.

12. Cenite konja. Dobri trenerji pohvalijo vsak napredek, pa naj bo ta še tako neznaten, vedno sledi prijazna beseda in nagrada. In še večja je zahvala ob koncu učne ure. Konji razumejo pohvalo in se bodo za tistega, ki jih veliko hvali bolj potrudili in delali z večjim veseljem.

Izrekanje zahval in vrednotenje stvari, ki v ljudem iz drugih kultur nekaj pomenijo -- na ta način kažemo do njih spoštovanje in upoštevanje njihovih stališč.

Kako s težkimi primeri?


Vem, da mi boste nekateri takoj zastavlili vprašanje: »Kako naj ravnamo v primerih, ko nekdo noče sodelovati?« ali »Kaj storimo s skupino ali državo, ki nas hoče napasti?«

Najprej vas bom vprašala, če ste skupaj s svojimi upoštevali tudi njihova stališča. Z drugimi besedami, ste se do njih vedli spoštljivo? Ĉe nekoga preziraš to ni mir -- prezir preprečuje vzpostavitev miru.

Tu je bistvo: Ko se dva prezirata in si škodita, lahko KATERIKOLI vzame vajeti v roke in poskrbi da stvari stečejo bolje. Ta je PRVI, ki bo vzel stališča drugega v zakup.

Priporočam vam, da vzamete pisalo in znova preletite vodila za treniranje konj. Pri vsaki točki si zapišite s katerimi dejanji ste do »sovražne« skupine ali osebe ravnali spoštljivo.

Nato pripišite česa pri posamezni točki še niste storili in kaj bi lahko.

Ugibam, da se niste kaj prida pozanimali, kaj je za skupino ali osebo pomembno. Kar pogumno. Internet in knjižnica vas čakata...

Ko ste se informirali, in lahko s svojimi besedami izrazite za druge pomembne stvari, takrat »stopite k konju in poskusite z njim delati s tal«. Preden »zajahate« (razpravljate o kočljivih zadevah) spoznajte koga znotraj te skupine ali države kot prijatelja. Vsem ljudem je skupno najmanj to, da želijo ostati živi, imeti dobre prijatelje in uporabljati razum pri projektih, ki jih zanimajo.

Zdaj pa lahko začnete.